Forum post from parenting website…..reducing maintenance

Posted: January 20, 2012 in Oh woe is poor little me, Trying to be a good parent !

Maintenance lawyer / specialist 3 hours, 46 minutes ago

Hi there !

Was wondering if anyone knows a good CT maintenance lawyer ?

I need to get to one. To stop a potenial decrease.

I’m a single parent of a 12 and a half year old. I know I am very lucky as my ex-boyfriend contributes towards my daughter. We broke up when she was 13 months old.

He used to pay around R800 /R1000 pm (I would pay the creche out of that and he had her on his medical aid), but things changed when she started proper school. I enrolled her into a local school where the costs are around R19000 pa. I got her registered and i secured her a place. Her dad then decided she would got to a particular private school. I was hesitant as it is and was way out of my league. I was telephonically assured that the fees were not a problem. I thought why not then. Its a great school (ratio 1:13 this year !)

Roll forward to grade 6. My child is ADD and she has an anxiety disorder. Dad has been in rehab for 4 years, but is now working there as a counsellor. He does get paid, but not much (according to him). Although his family is wealthy and I know he has properties and land.

He has now come to me and said the maintenance is too much. He is “running out of money”. He pays her school fees, medical aid and R1500 pm. If the medical aid runs out I ask him for the cash back on her medicines for instance.

I look after all her daily expenses like accomodation, clothes, entertainment, food, pocket money etc.

Now he is threatening that I must chip in on the school fees/he is going to reduce the maintenance or he will take her out of her school where she has been for 7 years.

My child overheard him and his dad talking about this over Xmas and reported this all back to me. She reported back to me. Worried she is moving schools.

I really don’t want him to reduce the maintenance. I don’t want an increase. i just want my child to stay in her school where she is happy and flourishing. But I cannot afford to put in an extra R2000 pm.

I really don’t believe he is broke. I would honestly be understanding if I thought it was the case. But when he comes to CT on holiday he buys himself 10 CD’s a time and fancy ipods. Its just a ploy I feel.

She is so happy at her school and has been there her whole school career.

Oh yes. And they are taking her to Mauritus in August for the third time. Bought up in the same evenings conversation. Go figure.

Help ! 

  1. hilaryisabel says:

    Mark Elmes 083 310 1080 – 021 461 1227 lives in St James – very good lawyer recommended to me – specialises in maintenance matters.

    Good Luck –

    PS I had a weekend affair with a married man and fell pregnant by accident. He pays much more than yours does a month and school, excess medical costs and a nanny if I need one.


    • diddy says:

      Thanks for the info. I will definitely pursue it. I have got the ex boyfriend to agree not to change anything right now. But definitely need to get my ducks in a row and see what my and my daughter’s rights are !

      Thanks !!!

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